Interesting Birthday presents


Yes today is the big day

Guess what I got for my birthday? No, not jewelry. No, not some cool new techno gadget. I got a bladder infection. I know…I can hardly contain my excitement.

I don’t recall that being on my Top Ten list, and I’m thinking maybe I wasn’t clear enough. My birthday weekend was spent lying on the couch in pain half the day while watching the house fall apart.

Beating Diner Dash so I could finally get that pointless, time-wasting addiction off my phone was a bonus.

Gifts from my son:

He just said “Happy Birthday”. At least he acknowledged it. I think he almost said “Dude” but stopped short.

Gifts from my daughter

A note quickly scribbled on notebook paper saying “Happy Birthday” given to me the night before “in case I forget.” She added three years to my age. It is closer than the 65 she guessed earlier this week, but not enough for her to get out of being grounded for it. It’s like the Price is Right. If you overbid, you’re out of luck.

Gifts from the 4 year old included:

  • (a) Birthday carpet – It’s like a pretty decorated cake…only it’s not.
    She carefully and painstakingly spread an entire tub of small multi-colored beads evenly around the living room carpet. I also found them glued to the floor of Polly Pocket’s house using juice. I guess juice-beaded carpet is all the rage in Polly World. I assume she was going for a similar style on my carpet since I found 7 CapriSuns squished flat among the beads. Oops..I may have spoiled a birthday surprise when I cleaned it up.

  • (b) Birthday games
    In addition to the beads, she also spread out a deck of cards, a jar’s worth of buttons, all the pieces to the marble raceway, and Polly pocket stuff. I really enjoyed the birthday sorting game, but for future reference, I prefer Pin the Tail on the Donkey.

  • (c) Avoiding bath time?
    Trying to spare me the chore of helping her take a shower, she washed her hair using large amounts of her own combination of Johnson’s Baby Wash, Suave strawberry shampoo, and possibly shaving cream (based on the strange smell)…without running water. She rinsed her hair by the sink using 2 wads of wet toilet paper, so you can imagine the result. I appreciate the effort, but now the shower I was going to skip seems to be an urgent necessity.

  • (d) Not stopping up toilet using an entire roll of toilet paper, and that is always a good…rare…day.

Who wouldn’t be feeling better after all those gifts?


I think back to the most memorable birthday present I ever received. An orange lava lamp, which was carefully selected by the kids all by themselves. Proudly displayed in the room painted green, I was able to enjoy the breath-taking color-combination of my favorite holiday, Halloween, 365 days a year. Two years later I claimed it was a fire hazard, and it suspiciously “disappeared.”

The good news is…

  • Victoria Secret’s sent me a $10 off coupon for a new bra which is fantastic because now I will only have to suffer being stabbed in the back by the bent clasps 4 out of every 5 days. Whoo hoo!!! This also reduces the risk of it coming undone while standing in the grocery store line. There’s just no graceful way to fix that in public.
  • I feel better today! YAY! Almost normal enough to tackle the mess.
  • This weekend I did get to sneak away for a couple of hours for a yummy birthday lunch with one of my best friends. Thanks, Karen!

…and then…the greatest gift of all

My three sweet kids just being themselves…and I can’t ask for anything better than that.


  1. Happy birthday!!! Sorry you spent a lot of it feeling bad with the bladder infection, but I’m glad you’re feeling all better now. Aren’t kids just the best gifts ever?!

  2. How beautiful. Your children are surely a blessing to you. Hope you now feeling better and able to have a great special day.
    Patricia Perth Australia
    Patricia recently posted..Lavender Species- Spoilt for ChoiceMy Profile

  3. Happy birthday! Hope you’re okay with your bladder infection, keep calm πŸ™‚ I’m very happy that you have a loving batch of kids πŸ™‚
    Felicia recently posted..Miss Finland – Ziigmunds new dateMy Profile

  4. A bladder infection for your birthday?! Yikes! (If they charged you a fee at whatever gift registry you used, I’d ask for a refund πŸ˜‰ I love your “greatest gift of all”, even if they call you “dude”, overbid for you and mess up the house, those moments are terrific memories, aren’t they? They really are the best gift of all!! I hope you’re back to 100% and I wish you a very happy birthday!
    Jessica Sieghart recently posted..Just NumbMy Profile

  5. Hey I didnt know today’s the day… Happy birthday, Melinda! πŸ™‚

    Ouch! A bladder infection? That must’ve hurt, I’m glad youre doing fine now and enjoyed your birthday with your kids. Theyre just too cute πŸ™‚
    Cindy recently posted..Live Video Broadcast on your Blog with Justintv and WibiyaMy Profile

  6. Oh! happy Melinda birthday πŸ™‚

    The pleasure of having someone who remember you is the real gift!

    I wish you long life surrounded with health, happy life with your super awesome kids!
    Hesham recently posted..Are you Wasting Time In Social Media MarketingMy Profile

  7. How did I miss this site? You are hilarious. (I swear I was somewhere on this delightful blog before.)

    Happy birthday! (I try to never say “Belated” since I was the one who be late, not you)

    Anyway, this one statement brought back a sharp, rather unpleasant memory:
    “Oops..I may have spoiled a birthday surprise when I cleaned it up.”

    I once yelled at my son for making a mess with a ton of scrap paper. My wife pulled me aside and whispered, “He’s making a birthday present for you.”
    Mortification is not the word for what I felt. But this is a family friendly blog, so yeah, I was mortified.

    I never said another thing to him about twisting paper. He went on to major in Engineering At Indiana State U. πŸ™‚


    Mitchell Allen recently posted..FTC – Failure To CommunicateMy Profile

  8. Isn’t cranberry juice good for that infection? I think your day sounds suspiciously like Groundhog Day 2 — coming to a theater near you soon! Seriously, living to be another year older is a blessing. Happy to know you.
    Tom Baker recently posted..CaptionΒ GameMy Profile

  9. Greetings form your kids are enough to complete your day. My mom usually says to me that material gifts aren’t really that important so long as me and my other siblings are doing fine, she will always be happy for her entire life.
    MikeRamsey recently posted..Understanding Nocturnal Excessive SweatingMy Profile

  10. We really don’t celebrate birthdays. I forget even my own! I stress to my kids, though, that we have to be thankful for being alive today, every day that we find ourselves awake in the morning, whether it’s our birthday or not. As for special gifts, time spent together is the most precious. πŸ™‚
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